Wednesday 28 October 2020

Who Did You Marry? (Part Two)

You Are the One I Married

The Idol that Plagues:

For a great many, the avoidance of reality is a passive, unconscious one. Their lives have been so affected, both good and or bad, by some personality in their past, which they have brought into their present. They do not see their spouse as he or she is. What they see is the person from their past, their idol. This is their reality and the measuring stick they use for everyone else. They labor in vain to force their spouse into the image of their idol.

For some, this idol was gotten from places as mundane as storybooks, novels, and movies. Romanticism sold them some baloney, and they bought in hook, line, and sinker. They are, as it were, willful captives of romanticism. They are sold to it as what reality is or should be. They wonder why their spouse does not fit into the image of the “prince charming” or “beauty queen” portrayed in those stories. 

What went wrong, they ask? Have they been handed the wrong end of the stick, or what? Unknown to them, those are mere actors and figments of men’s imagination. The real world is not that perfect. It is made of broken people with rough edges. The earlier they wake up from their daydreaming, the more their life is lived right and productively. There are no angels on this side of eternity. Everyone else is just as human as you are.

Chasing after Shadows:

Unfortunately, many, rather than face life head-on, resort to seeming quick fixes. Chief amongst these are masturbation and pornography. These twin evils are fast becoming the number one destroyer of marriages and lives in general. As innocent as they might seem, it has far more reaching power and hold than they are given credit for. They usher one into a fake, make-believe world that does not exist. They entrap and further dissociate one from reality.

Those who act in all those X-rated pornography movies do not have their own lives and marriages together. They do it only for the money and the supposed quick fix. Yet, supposed sane people think they can have what they see and still have their lives together. Someone sure sold them baloney. Someone sure sold them a lie. And, worst of all, they believe and are reveling in it. 

Someone is taking advantage of the cravings of their base, lower nature. Someone is turning them against their own very self and destiny. They have become willing captives, and they know not.

Face Reality:

Your marriage and your spouse are the real deal. Wake yourself up from that bad dream and face the reality of who you married. Get to know and enjoy one another. Yes, it will take time, just like every good thing in life. Trust me. It is worth the effort. It is worth the sacrifice. Help your spouse be your prince charming or beauty queen.

The grass only looks greener on the other side because they are tending to it. Give your own marriage the same care and see it sprout. You can do it. Yes, you can.

© 2015 Akin Akinbodunse

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