"Dudes: It's not 'babysitting' if it's your own kids. If you love them and you helped make them, then you help take care of them. It's your job, too." —Joe and Anna Raway, married 19 years, Lakeville, MN.
The important lesson here is for each couple to have an agreement on how they plan to share responsibilities. There should be no assumptions. EVERYTHING needs to be agreed on, lest there be unnecessary disagreements and disappointments.
Get rid of the traditions and stereotypes. It might not work for your spouse. Know your spouse and know what he or she is signing up to. Also, let your spouse know what you are agreeing to sign up for. It is better to agree to disagree, than to fool each other, only to live a marriage of misery.
EVERYTHING, absolutely EVERYTHING is subject to negotiation and agreement. And, your agreements NEEDs to be guided by a win-win or no deal ideal. Otherwise, it is an accident looking for where and when to happen.
The Saint.
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